Archive for BDSM

BDSM-related music: Depeche Mode – Master and servant

Posted in Music with tags , , , , , on December 1, 2010 by ladyadumalevil

Domination is the name of the game, in bed or in life!

Yes, yes, I know this song was originally intended as a manifesto addressed to politics and the way the world is ruled, but if you detach yourself from the political views it fights against, you will see that it can very well relate to the world that interests us. It’s a lot like life, right?

Depeche Mode – Master and servant

It's a lot
It's a lot
Like life

There's a new game
We like to play you see
A game with added reality
You treat me like a dog
Get me down on my knees

We call it master and servant
We call it master and servant

It's a lot like life
This play between the sheets
With you on top and me underneath
Forget all about equality

Let's play master and servant
Let's play master and servant

It's a lot like life
And thats what's appealing
If you despise that throwaway feeling
From disposable fun
Then this is the one

Domination's the name of the game
In bed or in life
They're both just the same
Except in one you're fulfilled
At the end of the day

Let's play master and servant
Let's play master and servant

Let's play master and servant
Come on master and servant.
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A few words on relationships

Posted in Opinions and Articles with tags , , , on November 28, 2010 by ladyadumalevil

Today I’m a little moodier than usual and I stumbled upon a song which seems to fit with my state of mind. I was thinking of relationships, how they begin, how they end and so on. Are D/s relationships or relationships which involve BDSM elements the same? Well, of course they are, at least very similar. They still involve people. Even if some of us might like them more impersonal, a feeling of mutual sympathy and respect still exists. Moreover, not few are the cases when actual love occurred between the partners, who have lived happily ever after.

The steps we take before getting involved with a person are quite the same: we meet, we find out if we have common interests, likes, dislikes. We talk, talk some more, go out again and then maybe we’ll get to the “behind closed doors part”. Then we all go on with our daily lives, but we still talk with our partner and see each other from time to time (or maybe daily, whatever, this storyline is just for fun, it is easily changeable), then suddenly everybody knows we’ve left the  “single” category.  In unfortunate cases, a rapture appears and the two break up; hearts break and wounds heal in time or maybe the the two actually remain friends. Sounds very vanilla up to now, right?

Well, maybe not so vanilla somewhere in-between. As a Dominant or a submissive person, we choose the types of relationships we would like to have with others. We might want long-term relationships or only occasional sessions; we might want to have a typical relationship besides the BDSM one with the same person, or we might just want to stick to the D/s one, not wanting to involve with a partner in a multi-level relationship.  Some choose a D/s relationship as a “parallel life”, when they know that they cannot have this with their spouse, but they know their spouse is the perfect partner from all other points of view.  It’s not easy deciding what you want from life in general, but add BDSM to it and everything just gets more messed up.

From my point of view, the best way to go is to have a long-term BDSM relationship with your partner. Maybe you discovered it together and experimented all kind of things, maybe you met in the scene and decided you were a match, or maybe you wanted it and presented the lifestyle to your partner, “converting” him or her to the ever-moving world of BDSM.  Some might not agree with me, but a relationship needs trust and communication, and these two don’t come in easily. It takes time to get to trust one another and to learn how to tell each other about your desires, fantasies etc. Not to mention that, in time, non-verbal communication occurs and you tend to know what feels good, what doesn’t, what your partner wants and so on without him or her even telling you.  This applies to both D/s relationships (when the partners only meet with this purpose in mind), TPEs and people who have a “BDSM-bedroom” relationship (my own definition for people who are like a vanilla couple all the time and they have a D/s relationship only in the intimacy of their bedroom). So, long-run in the key, at least to my mind!

BDSM-related music: Sunterra – Quid est Libertas? (Who owns the liberty?)

Posted in Music with tags , , , , , , on October 4, 2010 by ladyadumalevil

Sunterra, a band I know nothing about.  Or should I say, knew nothing about it until recently. They subscribe to the gothic metal genre, but to me it is quite difficult to listen to. It has two singers, a female and a male; the guy mostly screams, but the song in general is pretty decent. As far as I know, it’s the only BDSM-related song from the band, but mind you, I might be wrong.  So, if you enjoy metal music combined with symphonic elements, this is the BDSM song for you.

Enjoy! (Oh, and by the way, I translated the Latin and German phrases in brackets, with italic)

Late at night I can hear
Whispering behind the wall
Suddenly my girl comes in
Looks like a Black-rubber-doll

She holds the whip in her hand,
Now I can’t do stupid things,
I go down on my knees –
Quid est libertas? (Who owns the liberty?)

With a smile on her face
But strictness in her voice
I can taste my sweat
I don’t have any choice

She holds the whip in her hand,
Now I can’t do stupid things,
I go down on my knees –
Quid est libertas? (Who owns the liberty?)

Hey girl – I’m not your slave!
I will gag you that’s true
Show you how I imagine
What you should do

I hold the whip in my hand,
Now you can’t do stupid things,
My lovely black rubber doll –
Meum est libertas! (Mine is the liberty!)

I hold the whip in my hand,
Now you can’t do stupid things,
My lovely black rubber doll –
Meum est libertas! (Mine is the liberty!)

Odisse! (I hate this!)
Die Menschen lieben von Natur aus die Freiheit (People naturally love freedom)
Und hassen den Zustand der Knechtschaft. (And hate the state of servitude)

I hold the whip in my hand,
Now you can’t do stupid things,
My lovely black rubber doll –
Meum est libertas! (Mine is the liberty!)

I hold the whip in my hand,
Now you can’t do stupid things,
My lovely black rubber doll –
Meum est libertas! (Mine is the liberty!)

BDSM-related music: Ordo Rosarius Equilibrio

Posted in Music with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 19, 2010 by ladyadumalevil

This is the first post regarding music which without question sends its listeners straight into the BDSM world, be it by suggestive lyrics, themes or simply by creating a specific mood. Enjoy!

ORDO ROSARIUS EQUILIBRIO (ORE, in short) is a neofolk – apocalyptic folk band based in Stockholm formed out of Tomas Pettersson and Rose-Marie Larsen, accompanied by various other musicians for live performances. Their style is impossible to confuse with some other bands’, as eroticism springs out of both their lyrics and instrumental parts.  Although they don’t necessarily deal with BDSM in general, their themes revolve around catholic and religious symbolism, politics, war, occultism and sexuality.

Up to now, they have visited Romania twice and will return on the 5th of November, probably for the launching of their new album ” Songs 4 hate and devotion”.

Now, to the songs that have caught my eye! 🙂

Mistress of the Hourglass Figure

My loved doll, in rubber thong
You know to whom, you do belong
Your garters hold, your stocking strains
Tender love, within restraint
Tightened strings, crown your back
6-inch heels, enhance your feet
Seductress who, belongs to me

Naked Things, detained in lace
I show you love, I show you grace
Nipples firm, but in disguise
Fastened garters, dress your thighs
A corset holds, your body lush
With lustful bonds, of sanctioned trust
In stockings, you emerge to me
My loved doll, in 6-inch heels

Now, how much more explicit can they be?  “Mistress” strikes you from the very title, then they mention “rubber thongs” (and we all know that is a common fetish) ; the term “restraints” sends ones’ thoughts straight to bondage. They mention still some common fetish articles : corsets, extremely high heels, lace, stockings, garters etc… And what strikes me most, the suggested idea of possession, of a Master and a submissive female.

Safe, Sane and Consensual

And yet another suggestive title, with the well-known BDSM motto: Safe, Sane and Consensual. I hope you who are reading this know what SSC refers to! If not, proceed to Google and find out! It’s a must!

The song is actually an instrumental one. The music is seductive and peaceful, but you can hear the sound of the whip and of a whipping throughout the song. From time to time, a woman’s voice (probably Rose Marie’s) says Safe, Sane and Consensual, as a reminder to everybody into this world. Do not forget to take precautions, do not go over the line and always take your partner into consideration.

The Pleasure of Pain

This is yet another interesting song from the band; it is actually a duet with Spiritual Front.  The instrumental part is simply amazing; the song includes a spoken male voice which I believe is taken from a 1960s American documentary, Perversion for Profit. These excerpts are very well chosen, I recommend it. But  I wouldn’t approach the documentary if I were you, it is simply laughable. It suggests that teenagers are perverted, coerced into lesbianism, homosexuality and SM by magazines with revealing pictures. Yeah, riiiiiight! 

She’s in love with a whip – My Venus in furs

(Velvet Underground cover)

Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather
Whiplash girlchild in the dark
Clubs and bells, your servant, don’t forsake him
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

Downy sins of streetlight fancies
Chase the costumes she shall wear
Ermine furs adorn the imperious
Severin, Severin awaits you there

I am tired, I am weary
I could sleep for a thousand years
A thousand dreams that would awake me
Different colors made of tears

Kiss the boot of shiny, shiny leather
Shiny leather in the dark
Tongue of thongs, the belt that does await you
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

Severin, Severin, speak so slightly
Severin, down on your bended knee
Taste the whip, in love not given lightly
Taste the whip, now plead for me

I am tired, I am weary
I could sleep for a thousand years
A thousand dreams that would awake me
Different colors made of tears

Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather
Whiplash girlchild in the dark
Severin, your servant comes in bells, please don’t forsake him
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

And yet again, do I really need to explain this one? It sends you right to Sacher-Masoch’s novel, “Venus in Furs”…

Let me show you all the secrets of the Torture Garden

I will lead you through the door,
with a pledge to be adored
let me show you who I am

I will dress you in constraints
with the promises of pain
let me show you what I can

I will tie you to a chair
kiss your neck and pull you hair
let me show you who I am

lace your feet and kiss your legs
fold your eyes and make you beg
let me show you who I am

kiss your face and touch your skin
I will slide my fingers in
let me show you what I can

I  will open up your eyes
I will show what’s inside
let me show you who I am

golden wine in sterling cup
I will have you drink it up
let me show you who I am

leave you on the floor
let you plead and beg for more
let me show you what I can

I absolutely adore this song! To me it represents a Domm(e)’s plegde to His/Her submissive in an extravagant, tempting, seductive way.

This concludes my ORE post, for now at least.  Check them out at:

http://www.myspace.com/ordorosariusequilibrio

Siguranta in BDSM – Partea a II-a

Posted in Traduceri with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 16, 2010 by ladyadumalevil

Watersports

Atat urina, cat si fecalele fara sange sunt ok pe exteriorul pielii.  Daca observati pe piele taieturi, zgarieturi nu urinati sau defecati in acel loc. Nu uitati ca si un cos este tot o rana!

Urina in cavitatea bucala prezinta un risc minim de HIV, dar daca vezica este infectata, alte BTS-uri se pot transmite. Drogurile trec prin urina fara a suferi schimbari chimice.  In cazul prezentei fecalelor in cavitatea bucala, se pot transmite hepatita, alte BTS-uri, precum si paraziti intestinali. Ca parte a testelor regulate impotriva BTS, testati-va si pentru paraziti intestinali. Fiti atenti la simptomele unei infectii parazitare precum diaree, balonare, dureri, schimbari ale apetitului, ale greutatii sau nivelului general de energie.

Legaturi si Bondage (imobilizare)

Aveti grija ca materialul pentru imobilizare sa fie unul flexibil, iar legaturile sa nu fie foarte stranse, mai ales in zona gatului si a incheieturilor, ce pot fi foarte usor ranite. Inainte de a incepe o scena bondage, interesati-va de starea sanatatii partenerului (probleme de circulatie, mamografii neregulate sau orice alta situatie relevanta).

Niciodata nu lasati o persoana legata nesupravegheata si fiti siguri ca aveti la indemana un forceps bun pentru a taia rapid legaturile! Gag-urile din material textil (lenjerie, sosete etc) ar trebui sa fie udate inainte, pentru a impiedica senzatia de voma, iar cele folosite sub o cagula trebuie sa permita o respiratie corespunzatoare.

Tehnica necorespunzatoare poate deteriora legaturile nervoase, poate provoca incapacitatea de a respira si chiar moartea prin strangulare sau asfixiere. Semenele de avertizare pentru persoanele top sunt :

–          albirea pielii;

–          invinetirea pielii;

–          temperatura foarte joasa a corpului.

Persoanele care au rolul de bottom, inspecial cei aflati la inceput, pot avea atacuri neasteptate de panica in imobilizare, mai ales sub cagule. Ca bottom, ar trebui sa dati semne rapide de avertizare cand simtiti panica apropiindu-se, iar ca top trebuie sa fiti pregatiti oricand sa ractionati rapid si sa oferiti sprijin afectiv. Aceste atacuri de panica pot fi foarte violente, rezultand uneori in ranirea ambilor parteneri.  Top-ul nu trebuie sa se panicheze, iar legaturile trebuiesc inlaturate de-abia dupa cateva minute, cand bottom-ul s-a calmat suficient.

Restrictionarea circulatiei nu este valabila numai in cazul franghiei sau al bandei adezive, ci si in cazul catuselor. Aveti grija cat de mult le strangeti si incercati sa aveti mereu chei de rezerva in apropiere.

Daca folositit banda adeziva aplicata direct pe piele, la smulgerea acesteia se vor rupe si fire de par si stratul superior al epidermei. Cand folositi asemenea materiale prin care pielea nu poate respire (banda adeziva, folie de platic pentru impachetare), fiti atenti la conditiile ambientului; in cazul unei calduri excesive sau al unei sedinte prelungite, deshidratarea se produce foarte repede.

Loviturile

Jocurile cu lovituri includ:

–          spanking (lovirea feselor), de la usor la dur;

–          whipping (biciuire);

–          flogging (flagelare);

–          caning (lovirea cu un baston de ratan, bambus s.a.) etc.

Acest tip de joc trebuie practicat numai pe anumite zone ale corpului; incheieturile sunt fragile, bustul si trunchiul au si ele zone sensibile. Nicio lovitura nu ar trebui sa ajunga in zona rinichilor, deoarece acestia sunt atasati de splina. Capul, zona gatului si a splinei sunt zone de evitat. Cele mai bune zone pentru lovituri sunt: fesele, coapsele, gambele, partea de sus a spatelui si muschii din zona pieptului.

Atentie la urme! Unele persoane prefera urmele, vanataile si ranile vindecate, in timp ce altele prefera sa le evite cat mai mult posibil. Cu un pic de antrenament, se poate provoca o senzatie intensa fara a lasa urme si se pot provoca urme fara senzatii intense.  Atentie si la persoanele cu o piele mai sensibila, care se inroseste si la cea mai usoara lovitura. Nu prezinta o problema de sanatate, dar urmele pot aparea mai repede decat va asteptati.

Jucariile subtiri si varfurile ascutite pot rani pielea foarte usor, daca loviturile sunt de  intensitate ridicata;  atentie la bastoane (canes), bice flagelatoare din cauciuc, bice de tip single-tail (cu o singura “coada”) si cele asemanatoare. Daca in timpul jocului pielea s-a rupt, cititi sectiunea Blood Sport/ Piercing pentru sfaturi de curatare a pielii si sectiunea de Curatare a jucariilor.

Whipping (biciuirea)

Inaintea unei scene de flagelare/biciuire, ambii parteneri ar trebui sa acopere orice rani deschise, deoarece pot fi atinse de instrumente. Daca totusi doriti sa va jucati mai dur sau ranile sangerande apar oricum, nu folositi biciul sau floggerul pe mai multe persoane (atentie, bicele nu pot fi curatate complet!)

Blood Sports/ Piercing

Acele de seringa si seringile sunt folosite in jocurile BDSM pentru piercinguri temporare sau pentru injectarea unei solutii saline in scrot sau in alte zone sensibile ale corpului.  Unii folosesc scalpele pentru a crea un design temporar sau permanent pe piele.

Locul in care asezati intrumentele sterile trebuie sa fie extreme de curat. Folositi cu un dezinfectant medical, conform instructiunilor producatorului.

Inainte de a incepe procedura de piercing, taiere, marcare (branding) sau eliminare a parului, pielea trebuie curatata. Folositi o discheta de bumbac curata si alcool medicinal si/sau orice alt antiseptic special pentru piele.  Atentie, alcoolul doar curata, nu sterilizeaza! De aceea ar fi bine ca, in urma curatarii zonei cu alcool, aceasta sa fie sterilizata cu o solutie antiseptica.

Folositi numai ace noi, sterile, de unica folosinta. Refolosirea acelor poate duce foarte usor la infectarea cu HIV sau alte BTS!

Branding and scarification (marcarea si scarificarea)

Ambele practici sunt sigure din punct de vedere al transmiterii HIV, desi riscul pentru hepatita C este incert.

Pentru marcare este recomandat un echipament de unica folosinta sau folosirea echipamentului pe un singur bottom. Marcarea cu o lama ar trebui efectuata cu un scalpel medical cu lama de unica folosinta, ce poate fi achizitionat de la magazinele de echipamente medicale. O lama de ras manuala nu ar trebui niciodata utilizata de mai multe persoane.

Electro-play (jocul cu electricitatea)

Electricitatea poate provoca reactii usoare, cum ar fi furnicaturile, dar si contractii musculare violente. Problemele de sanatate legate de activitatea cardiaca ar trebui discutate inainte. O persoana cu un dispozitiv de tip pace-maker sau care ia medicamente pe baza de nitrati nu poate purta o zgarda electrica si trebuie sa fie foarte atenta in orice alte jocuri care implica electricitatea.

Evitati apa cand va jucati cu electricitatea; apa face ca zona de actiune a electricitatii sa fie imprevizibila.